Kill ‘Em All legacy:Chapter 5: Unauthorized Offspring and a wedding.

Thanks for rejoining us dear readers! Olivia here has reach teenhood and has the public enemy aspiration. She also now has the evil trait.

“I’m hot and I get to beat people up. How cool is that?”

Olivia begins studying her vampire lore. Main goal right now is to get her to get the sun proof attribute so she doesn’t burn to death.

“You know, that might not be so bad. Then I could ghost scare people. AND bite them. A vampire ghost!”

You forget Olivia I eventually need a baby out of you.

“Can you kill me after then?”

…no.

And Olivia also gets her first taste of plasma. She looks a little to happy for to me.

“Negative relationship points, its easer to get them to hate me! Best interaction EVER!”

Just think when you’re an adult you can beat them up to!

Don’t worry folks Oliva is still on top of being mean to…well…everyone. Not a night goes by she doesn’t berate, mock, shove, or just generally make everyone hate her.

Estrella’s wife finally died. Took like a week. I even made them divorce to move on with Cory and Estrella’s relationship it took her so long to die.

“Your romantic future is bleak.”

“Well considering every man or woman I marry will eventually end up six feet under…I guess you could say that?”

At least you’re looking on the positive side of things Olivia!

So I finally came to a decision about these two. I’m going to take a break from murdering spouses until Olivia comes of age and can get married. I’ll let Cory and Estrella be happy together. At least they can’t have any babies! *happy dance* One kid is enough, and I don’t have to deal with another until Olivia spawns a brat.

“Oh Cory, I knew you would eventually see those other women lacked…well, everything. And at least Renee can’t murder me.”

“Babe, I’ve had my eyes on you since I saw you burn to death. The others were just for the money.”

At least pretend that you loved them Cory!

And with the romance festival in town, these two got a shot-gun wedding. Although Olivia does not look pleased.

“Hey I’m happy for dad, but I do plan to kill more spouses than him. But I’m going to make them hate me before they die. So I can laugh at their graves.”

So positive Olivia.

“Cory I love you so much. If I ever catch you eyeing another woman, man, or ghost I will burn you to death. I can start fires when angry. Don’t forget it.”

And indeed she can. I had no idea a ghost who burned to death could do that. Estrella got angry about something and had the ability to start a fire on the main lot…although that might be useful for killing Olivia’s future spouses.

Not really a point to this picture, its just freaking adorable.

“So even though I really want to be mean to you, Renee won’t let me. Apparently we have to be friends?”

“Olivia sweetie, you don’t want to piss me off. I can start fires, like I told your father. Maybe we can evil kill together in the future?”

“That would be freaking awesome!”

You two realize that is Olivia’s bed right?

“She can sleep in the coffin now that she has come into her powers. Go away we are getting some paranormal woohoo on.”

After forcing these two to stargaze for 8 hours straight they are finally friends! Now if Olivia would just stop being randomly mean to her father and step mother the relationships would stop dropping!

Oh no. No. No. NOOOOOO. Why will the action not cancel out!? Cory, you get back here right now!!!! It was okay when it was Olivia! Females and ghost can’t get knocked up!

You live in an apartment, how is this even possible!? Well maybe you are not pregnant, its only like what a 30% chance or less? Right? Please don’t be pregnant. I don’t want another baby! We don’t NEED another baby!

After a quick google search and discovering Cory’s “uncomfortable for unknown reasons moodlet” it seems someone is knocked up with an alien spawn according to those blue sparkles. I’ve never had a baby by abduction before. All have been made in CAS aliens, or alien bred to alien in-game. Of course you have to go and do this Cory. Why wouldn’t you have to go and do the ONE thing I absolutely do NOT want.

“How do you think I feel? Do you even know what they did to me!?”

I don’t care! Your wife was abducted to! Did she wine and cry about it!? No! Your lucky I don’t kill you right now! Just one child was fine. Olivia was the only kid you needed! You better pray that you are not pregnant with twins!

“So what’s it like being probed dad? ”

“Really Olivia? Why don’t you just wait your turn. Everyone in this house but you has had a chance to meet aliens!”

“I’ll just beat the $##(*$ out of them. Anyway, they can’t get me pregnant.”

Olivia is getting into her first fight. I’m so proud! *cries tears of joy*

Yeah, yeah, surprise Cory. You’re in what your second trimester? You still better be hoping that is NOT twins. You do not want to see what I will do if it is.

Father-daughter bonding and biting time. A nightly ritual to building up Olivia’s vampire skill. Since she does burn a little on her way to school. And can’t do anything outside. So boring 😦At least someone in the house seems to be happy about the baby.

“I get to be a mom! Well…sorta. I can teach the baby all sorts of things! He will be just like me!”

*sighs* I guess after your senseless murder (I mean she did have to die), I can let you have this one Estrella. Although….I still don’t want this kid. Not much to do about it now.

No brakes! Back to building that rocket for your wife Cory!

“But…my back hurts, and I ache, and…”

Don’t care. Get back to work. Worthless pregnant vampire…

Despite the fact that Olivia isn’t hers Estrella has somehow gotten up to parenting level five, and on her own started helping Olivia with her homework. Cory never did that!

So Cory went to the hospital and gave birth to this unauthorized little demon spawn. While he IS cute. I’m still not happy he was born. Hence his name, Accident.

“Really? Accident? You are going to scar my son for life!”

Cory do not argue with me on this! You and your  son are lucky I don’t pick the “Send back to home world” option! Do you realize the hell of raising a toddler? That is why you only had one baby!

Don’t look at me. Don’t talk to me. Stop looking cute. You were not supposed to be born! I don’t need you! What am I going to do with you!?

Stop playing in the toilet. Stop making a mess. Just…stop doing anything even remotely adorable.

Olivia! Stop! Don’t encourage it!

“You know, he is pretty cute. Look at that little stubby nose and pointy ears. Although I do want to try to crush his dreams….”

Wow, mean sims can crush the dreams of toddlers? That’s a bit much. Not happening Olivia! Then again…

Ugh. Fine I give up. He’s to adorable to hate. Although I’m still not sure what I’m going to do with him.

“Hi.”

Uh, hello.

“Why do you hate me?”

Erk. That adorable, rotten face. I don’t hate you. I just don’t like the fact you were born! Wonder if we can dump you off on a neighbor?
“Would you actually dump my brother off on a neighbor?”

YES! Fine we can keep him if you take care of him. Change his diaper, take him to the potty, and feed him. Understand Olivia? I am not making you guys care for this kid! If hes’ taken away its on you!

“Mommy, why does she hate me?”

“You silly little sweetheart, she is just cruel. She killed me.”

I gave you immortality since aliens can’t be vampires! You would be an adult by now!

“You going to kill him to?”

I don’t kill kids! (So he’s safe until adulthood).

Fine, I’m sorry Accident. We don’t dump you off on the neighbors and will try not to get you taken away by social services. As much as I hate toddlers they are so freaking cute, but so damn evil and needy.

Why does everyone fawn over this kid? It’s like they fight for his attention! At least some of us are happy about him being born.

“Why is she not paying attention to me! Everyone should pay attention to me!”

Don’t press your luck Accident. And leave your now sun immune sister alone. She has more important things to worry about. Like duck face and selfies.

Nothing like making a mess at the park, that other people have to clean up.

And finally some bush woohoo!

I’ll leave you guys there for now.

Next time: Will I dump Accident off on the neighbors?

Kill ‘Em All Legacy: Chapter 4. More murder and evil little girls.

When we left the household last time Olivia had made it her mission to make her new step-father miserable.

“Your going to be dead within twenty-four hours. How does that knowledge make you feel?”

“You’re a liar, and an evil little child! Just wait until I talk to your father!”

“Daddy won’t care.”

And true enough Cory didn’t care. He had already moved on to his next spouse. My attempt was to have his current husband die of anger. But it proved to hard, and I just didn’t have the patience for it.

Totally moving on. At least this future husband should be easy to kill.

“Why will you not DIE!?. You smell, Daddy hates you for hitting him, and I don’t like you!”

Olivia I’m trying. I really am. Even catching Cory cheating on him, Olivia declaring him and enemy, and Olivia constantly make mean comments to him would not get him angry enough to just die!

We even tried angry pasta. Total fail 😦

Olivia works diligently on raising her creativity skill and mastering that childhood goal before she grows up. Her social is already up to ten from terrorizing her dad’s current spouse and dead spouses.

Ugh. I just gave up. Since he was a vampire. Death by sunlight it is. Plus he was annoying.

And Cory actually cried this time. I almost felt bad. Almost.

And Cory finally managed to become friendly enough with Estrella to get her to move into the household! Yay! Pretty alien ghost!

Welcome to the family Estrella! Er…welcome back to the family I guess is the correct way of putting it. And after a google search I finally figured out its fire burning inside of her from her uh…death. And smoke surrounding her. I bad.

“Thanks? I think?”

Cory moves onto this lady as future spouse number…uh…something. I gotta go count the urns. 

Estrella makes herself useful and goes to find a future spouse of her own. 

Nothing like marriage in front of the urns of three previous ex-spouses.

“Cory, why do you have so many urns?”

“Don’t worry about it babe. Really. They were here when I moved in…?”

“Ugh! Your worse then the last step-parent! You didn’t even bring any money! *shoves*”

“Why are you so mean? You father loves me! We are going to have a family, and as your step-mother, I…”

God she looks evil.

“Lady, what do you not understand? See all those urns in the other room? They all tried to be my step parents to. Daddy doesn’t stay married!”

“Stop trying to be friends with me! I don’t like you! I HATE HATE HATE HATE you!”

Then she declared her an enemy. God I love this girl. So freaking mean.

Death by pufferfish is not working out as planned. This is going to take longer then I thought!

Cory, honestly? Who brings their young daughter to a BAR to help her with her homework? What type of parenting is that!?

So Estrella is indirectly responsible for this lady’s murder. She was kinda pointless to marry Cory anyway. She was already in a household and didn’t bring any money with her. Guess her fate was going to be the same anyway 😉

Your not looking so good. At least your ghost should be cool! Puffer fish inside the body? Yes, please!

Cory doesn’t let a little thing like the death of his wife slow him down and proposing to his latest conquest. Really, he should be used to it at this point.

Would be adorable besides the fact his death is imminent.

Making out with your new husband and getting caught by your dead ex-wife. Although for Cory this happens pretty much every night.

Olivia does not keep her mean side pent up. Even ghost are fair game for her anger. Although then they break everything.

“Hahah, your dead! And daddy is cheating on you in the next room! With another ghost!”

“…..he wouldn’t! He told me he loved me!”

“And everyone else whose dead in that room. Stupid ghost!”

Estrella why are you stalking Cory? He’s a little busy at the moment trying to kill his husband by woohoo.

“I….I think I like him. I mean, I know all of his spouses are dead, but…you already killed me….so I can’t die again.”

No girl. He has a purpose. To marry and have me kill his spouses. Do you want to die again. Wait…can you kill a ghost again?

This guy decides to go join a protest. It was his first and last.

Nice to see how people don’t care about a vampire burning to death in their midst.

Oh! Abduction! Who was it!? Please be Cory, and alien baby would be awesome!

Damn it Estrella! Your a ghost and female.

“At least I got to visit my home world! It was awesome!”

Waste of abduction if you ask me 😦

While Cory is woohooing one of his dearly departed wives, this guy shows up. Vampire ghost are pretty cool! Olivia moves right in to mock him for being dead.

And Estrella moves on to seduce this old lady, and Cory was attempting to seduce this red head until he discovered she was married with kids. Well, not that I mind her being married, but its the lack of money that bothers me!

Yay! $20,000 ! Thanks Estrella! How go try to woohoo your wife to death.

Stupid lady won’t die by woohoo, so Cory moves in to have a snack. Hey, she is good for something! 

“So…is she going to die to daddy?”

“Don’t they all sweetie?”

“What are you two talking about!? Nobody is dying! Estrella loves me!”

Uh yeah, I wouldn’t be so sure about that lady. Did I give you two permission to kiss?! Estrella your still married! And Cory! You need more wives to kill!

“But…I’m tired of everyone dying. Don’t I deserve to be happy with a  wife you won’t kill? Look, Olivia is growing up in a few days…can’t we go until she is an adult without murder?”

Ugh, you two! Don’t make me feel bad! I REFUSE!

Holy crap! Stop eating RIGHT NOW Olivia! That can kill you! That was for Estrella’s wife, not you! Your to young to die! I NEED you! And I do not want your father having another kid! 

So Estrella’s wife might be a little angry at the fact that she caught Cory and Estrella kissing. Then Cory beat the snot out of an old lady.

So while its wrong on so many levels, these two are adorable together. Vampire and alien ghost, together forever since neither of you can die unless I kill you. Or in Estrella’s case release her spirit.

“Cory, what do you say to a  little closet woohoo?”

“Baby, you couldn’t keep me away!”

While this was not my original intent they kept spinning up aspiration things for each other. And the level of cuteness. I can’t stand it.

While I think its cute, Estrella’s wife is not very pleased. “Cheating skank!”

So right now she is locked in the bathroom and I am attempting to starve her to death.

Oh stop crying. Cory isn’t cheating on you. You are DEAD! And your a creepy ghost. Thought the fish would be cool but that is just wrong.

And dear readers I will leave you here with Olivia getting ready to enter teen hood and have her vampire traits come to fruition. Estrella’s wife waiting to die. And Cory and her entering a relationship. Does this mean no more murder? 😦

Kill ’em All legacy Chapter 3: Traumatizing Olivia, and more murder!

So I liked Estrella so much I moved her in. So pretty! She isn’t going to marry Cory like everyone else, but will eventually move back in as a ghost.

“Wait….ghost? What!? “

So I tried starving her to death, but it was taking forever, and the fireplace would not start the tables on fire. So not fair.

“I’m really starting to not like you! Let me out! You crazy #&$*#$! I regret befriending Cory!”

Uh-huh. Now die already please. I want an alien ghost! Then you can marry people and I can murder them to! Double the fun!

While Estrella is awaiting her death, Cory is moving on to seducing the nanny. I give up giving Cory’s spouses numbers or names. I can’t remember. T_T.

“This day just keeps getting better and better!”

Just think: Immortality on the horizon! Now please stop building cooking skill and die?

So a fire finally started after setting off fireworks in the house. Didn’t realize fires jumped from room to room in the Sims 4. I’ve never killed a sim by fire before. Oops. Want to put that out Cory? Don’t want to kill you and Olivia.

And well whichever dead wife this is is freaking out about the fire in the hallway with a poor crying Olivia. Shes starving, and overtired. But won’t sleep due to me trying to kill Estrella. And has a sad moodlet. I sorta feel bad. Okay that’s a lie no I don’t.

While she’s glowing red, Estrella refused to DIE. What the hell girl! DIE ALREADY!

It’s about freaking time. It took two days!

“I’m going to haunt Cory’s ass so bad!”

Please do!

So as Olivia walks down the hall, she’s crying and look so sad. Has the “witnessed death” moodlet that is going to last for two days. Guess she is going to be growing up sad. She has spent most of her toddlerhood being sad, due to the mass murder going on. Sorry kiddo.

Oh! What a cool urn! I’ve never seen an alien urn before! Sweet! And don’t worry Estrella as soon as you come haunt us Cory will invite you into the household! But first you guys will have to build up your friendship, because I’m an idiot and didn’t realize you had to have a full green friendship bar to move a ghost into the house. Estrella’s and Cory’s was at half.

Uh…Grim, please don’t read on the kid’s bed. She’s seen enough in her short life. Wake up to the face of death himself isn’t going to go over well.

So Nanny man says yes to marrying Cory. Big mistake dude. Didn’t notice the urns in the other room?

Then marriage…so close to that black widow acheivment in game! I can taste it!

Grim, the kid is scared enough, and does not want to talk to you! Look, Cory has a pick up for your anyway!

“I was visiting anyway.”

Yes, Grim continues to just let himself in and stalk the entire household.

I really need a new method of killing spouses. Death by woohoo is getting a little old. But one last time!

Goodbye nanny man! And thanks for marking the fifth spouse we killed! We are doing well!

While Cory isn’t busy seducing elderly sims to kill them he is a pretty good dad. Trying to making Olivia happy here. Seeing so much murder kinda puts a damper on things for her.

“Pretty impressive collection if I do say so myself.”

You didn’t see the other two urns in the other corner grim! We are up to six!

Aww Olivia go ahead and make a mess. We need to lower your  manners anyway. I want to you grow up to be an evil, mean sim.

“Cory how could you cheat on me! There is gossip in the afterlife!”

“Babe, listen, it’s just that. I miss you,  uh…how about some ghostly woohoo?”

Nothing like getting caught cheating on your dead ex-wife by your other dead ex-wife.

It’s finally time for Olivia to grow up! She’s endured alot during her toddlerhood, but thank the plumbob its over. I HATE toddlers.

She grows up into a sassy, mean traited little girl. This is going to be awesome.

“I’m feeling the urge to go poke someone. Seeya later creator.”

And Cory moves onto love number 6. Another nanny who helped raise Olivia. Will have to be more creative with his death.

Luckily Olivia can now feed herself so is no longer in danger of being taken away.  See our updated digs? Can thank all Cory’s dead ex’s for that.

“Hey loser.”

“Cory, are you going to let your daughter talk to me that way!? I’m going to be her father someday soon!”

“I’ve already had five step-parents and now they are all pushing daisys. Good luck with that, idiot.”Pretty soon Cory and nanny dude #2 are exchanging vows. Welcome to the family! For now. Cory turns him into a vampire, cause I really want a vampire grave/urn.

Yay! Happy to see your ghost Estrella! How go hang out with Cory, build that friendship so we can move you in! Didn’t know alien ghost glowed form the inside. So awesome!

“Cory, aren’t you even the least bit mad she killed me?”

“Well, she ain’t killing me…and you get to live forever now. So…how is it bad?”

“You know, now that I think about it…”

“Hey ghost lady.”

“Hello evil child.”

“Be nice to me or I will have daddy marry and kill you!”

“Already dead kiddo. You need a new threat.”

“Haha, you’re going to DIE as soon as you turn into a vampire. Death by sunlight! I can’t wait!”

“Your father loves me! Just wait until I tell him about this!”

“Haha! Daddy won’t care! Hes’ probably woohooing one of my dead ex moms right now!”

While Olivia is not bullying her dad’s current spouse, she works childhood goal of  being creative.

“To bad this truck isn’t real, wouldn’t that be a cool way of killing daddy’s current husband?”

“I really really hate you. Just so you know.”

“Why are you so mean? ”

“Because its fun. And your stupid.”

“Daddy got thirsty, huh?”

Yep, and uh this husband may have caught Cory cheating on him with a ghost. Oops.

“Hehe, your dead. And old. And ugly.”

Olivia, stop making the ghost angry! They will break stuff!

“Daddy can fix it!”

While Olivia works on lowering her manners its time to head out. Join us next time for more murder, and Olivia just being evil in general!

Kill ‘Em all legacy: More murder and a baby!

So first things first. We need a sperm donor for Cory here. Since everyone he marries has uh…”accidents”. Don has some pretty good looks, so shortly after some meaningless-just woohooing you to get a baby action Cory surprises Don with the good news!

That and I need another sim to focus on. While meaningless murder by woohoo is fun a kid is needed. To bad I can’t skip the toddler stage totally, I mean I could, but that’s kinda cheating…and those little monsters are SO darn cute.

“Uh…how is that even possible? We only woohooed once and you went to the bathroom, men can’t get….”

Oh Don the magic of the sims. Yes men can! Count yourself lucky we only wanted you for baby DNA, or your urn might be the next decorating Cory’s bedroom.

So yeah thanks to Cory’s first two dead wives, we are  moving up in the world! Just a few more and land grab full service apartment here we come!

Speaking of wives. Hello ladies! What, nothing to say? 

Even though he is pregnant Cory doesn’t let a small thing like that stop him from beginning to seduce FW3 (future wife three). Sorry I don’t even bother learning these ladies names. Its too much work/effort. They don’t even last 24 hours after marriage usually.

“Oh Cory, I love you to! I can’t believe someone would leave you alone and pregnant! I’m to old now, but I’ve always wanted children! I’ll be such a great mom!”

Not that you will have the chance FW3.

FW 3 does have some uses. Like cleaning up a puddle left from grim. Who STILL shows up every day to visit. I don’t have the heart to take his key. The reaper showing up everyday is fitting.

Oh our first haunting! Hello uh…which wife were you again? FW1 or FW2?

“Your sadistic and cruel, and….poor Cory will never get over me!”

Not my fault you woohooed while you were over exhausted. Okay, maybe it was, but as for Cory not getting over you?

Well he is currently welcoming FW3 to the family!

Again Cory seems to not care, but he did get frozen next to the coffin. Ignore the stench off of FW3’s body. I may have forced her to keep woohooing even after she peed herself to make her die faster.

“I can’t wait to be an uncle! Hope this kid follows in your footsteps Cory!”

To bad the baby isn’t yours grim. I remember having a reaper baby in sims 3, this stinks

😦

I’m pretty sure this is FW2, but I didn’t realize Cory could continue to woohoo his dead ex’ wives when they haunt us! This is awesome! 

“I just don’t get it, but hey I’m on board. As long as we don’t have to get married, or I have to remain monogamous.”

Oh don you can go woohoo the entire town if you want. Nobody here cares. And at this point we have turned Don and his entire household into vampires…just cause.

Alright Cory! Blue baby girl! Blue baby girl!

Ugh. Blue baby boy, Oliver.

No. Just no. I have NO cute custom content for toddler boys. This is NOT okay Cory. Hold on, I gotta cheat here.

A few clicks of testing cheats in cas later welcome Oliver…err Olivia! Named after my favorite mass murderer in the sims 2. I totally cheated here. Oliver got a sex change into Olivia. Only thing I changed. And little Olivia here is a vampire. To bad vampire toddlers can’t suck plasma. How cool would that be!? So tempted to get the mod that allows toddler’s to murder, but I will pass.

Ugh that adorable rotten face. I HATE toddlers. So much work. But so cute and the same time. I loath this life stage SO much.

Olivia and Cory go visit the Caliente’s and daddy Don! Who takes to his son, er..daughter right away.

“I just….how is it possible?”

Don don’t worry your pretty little head about it. Go woohoo the Caliente sisters and their mother or something. Keep yourself occupied.

Poor little Oliva, what’s wrong?

“I saw the grim reaper! I scared!”

Oh sweetie, you will be seeing him a lot. Like every day. Your daddy woohoos old ladies to death for a living. And one day you will get to get married like daddy and kill all your spouses to!

“*sobbing*”

Er…to much to soon?

While Olivia is at daycare Cory goes out to scope out the bar for his next wife. I see some possibilities here! An alien ghost ex!? Yes, please!

Between looking for another spouse to kill, Cory is a great dad. Look at that happy toddler face.

And after a little seduction….meet FW4! I don’t want to bore you guys with the courtship part. We need to get right to the good stuff! Like the marriage and murder, am I right!?

First kiss, blah, blah, blah. Boring.

First woohoo in the bushes at the park. Yay? 

“Oh Cory! I waited my entire life for someone like you!”

Uh…well…

Cute park wedding, then the fireworks went off. FW 4 went home and Cory stayed and watched.

The celebration continued at home. About 4 times.

“Oops.”

I know Cory, I guess these ladies just don’t have the stamina they used to.

Oh, well, this is awkward. Previous wife haunting you while your current wife is dead on the floor. 

Oh damn. This just got worse. TWO previous ex wives haunting you and crying over the death of your current wife, and your toddler daughter seeing the body. Again Cory could care less his wife is dead on the floor but Oliva got a 12 hour sad moodlet from “witnessing death”. Sorry kiddo.

Best part about having four dead ex wives haunting you!? Free cleaning!

And ghostly woohoo! Like 4 hours after the death of your last wife. Its’ like having his own harem!

Hello there Estrella! I adore this sim. She is such a pretty alien! I think I found a future sim to murder/marry. To bad we can’t make her a vampire….but what about a ghost alien! Oh! Ideas! Ideas!

So…pretty…

Time to end with Cory teaching little Olivia her flash cards.

Join us next time for more murder and Olivia growing up!

Kill ‘Em ALL legacy: Grim is a stalker

Welcome to my semi legacy/black widow(er) challenge. Cory Widow (original I know) here has the mason baron attribute, but will never work a day in his life. He is jealous, romantic, and something else I can’t remember. All money brought into the household will be from his various wives. Who I shall be murdering. A lot. I’m cackling gleefully and getting back into murder.  He is a vampire as well. This is going to be SO much fun! Cory has the ability to get pregnant to carry on the family name, and also because just playing one sim in a household can be boring. His future child/children will carry on daddy’s mantle of killing spouses.

Cory started with and gets to keep is 20k. So he rented this crappy apartment. Its pretty big but he will soon enough be moving up thanks to his future dead ex-wives.

Cory spends the first few days sucking plasma to level up his vampire skills and searching out possible wives. I’m looking for an elder for him to marry…because death by woohoo sounds hilarious. 

And bingo! Red alert! Red alert! Future wife one!

“This is a little morbid….I mean you’re plotting her death and I have yet to even talk to her. Or learn her name.”

Her name is not important. Because death. She won’t live long enough for her name to matter at all. She is a way to fortune!

FW1 (future wife 1) is pretty easy to please. They are friends within a day. And Cory being a flirty guy has this in the bag. The homestead also has the flirty aura trait.

“Can I have your number baby? Oh don’t mind the age difference, I uh…love you. I’m not after your money or anything. My love is true. *Coughs*”

Cory takes all the right steps in making FW1 his girlfriend, etc. First kiss…

First woohoo. Look at that smile on her face. She totally loves the coffin woohoo.

And…WHAT!? Refusal!? That is NOT ALLOWED you evil woman! FW1, do you have a death wish!? I mean…well I guess I can’t really say anything. I’m going to kill her anyway. Apparently she base commitment issues because she refuses his proposal three more times. 

“Do you think I’m stupid!? I know  what you do to sims, and I won’t stand for it!”

Oh FW1 you actually think you have a choice in this? I never even bothered learning your name!

Fourth time is the charm, eh? Not that Cory really cares. He just putters around the apartment studying his vampire tomes. And getting some senior woohoo.

So FW 1 joins the household and brings in $20,000 by  marrying Cory. Yay! Now that they said their vows its on to more important things.

Well, I thought this death by woohoo/exhaustion thing would be easy. Here they are on woohoo five and FW1 is still holding strong. Not fair 😦

About time! “Cory, sweetie, I don’t feel so good….sweetie, could you….”

As his first wife lays dead on the floor, grim reaper gathering her up, what does Cory do?

Really Cory you could at least pretend to be sad you just woohooed your wife to death! Or at least WAKE UP for it! He didn’t even get the sad mood let. What the heck dude? Your wife just died! At least pretend to be sad!

“Hey there grim. Renee said I would be meeting you.”

“She and I have a previous history…she has a tendency to kill sims. Its a working relationship. Think I still have her on speed dial.”

So as FW1 is dead, Cory moves onto greener turf. Still no crying, he doesn’t even care. Sure it makes things easier for me, but my sims always cry and have a sad moodlet for days when a spouse dies! Maybe because they were just friends and married as opposed to soul mates?

“Grim, Baby, you ever see muscles this big? ”

Cory as heart-broken as I am to say this you can’t woohoo or have babies with the grim reaper. I just checked. Breaks my evil little heart.

Originally I did have Cory flirt with grim until they were “Soulmates”, but alas, it was not meant to be. He soon had to break it off so grim wouldn’t be getting jealous every time he comes for a new pick up.

Pretty soon they were on BFF territory and grim got an apartment key. And now shows up EVERY FREAKING DAY! Death himself stalks Cory!

“Gotta get my face time somewhere!”

Screw you grim!

“Grim man, while I appreciate all the work you do, lets discuss some boundaries.”

Grim just lets himself in, makes a mess, leaves glasses everywhere and is generally annoying when his isn’t reaping souls. Keep it up man and Cory will SO take away that apartment key!

This lady here was supposed to be Cory’s next wife, but for some reason she decided that being mean to him was a better alternative.

Cory tries his vampire wiles, but this lady isn’t having it. Throw drink? Dang lady, just wait, Cory will be back for you. You will not survive!

And Cory here moves onto FW2 (Future wife 2) while grim just hangs around his apartment for the fun of it. Grim, some privacy!

“Why? I’ll be back after the wedding anyway.”

Uh, true. Carry on then.

“I’m such a lucky girl! A hot young vampire loves me! He would face down death himself to have me! Hehe!”

Uh, right FW2. That is why he is currently ignoring you for his BFF grim?

Between seducing and woohooing his wives to death, Cory does go around and feed on random strangers. And continues to scout for future spouses. Since his don’t tend to live long.

That coffin is going to be worn out soon Cory, just saying…

“Oh, FW2, will you do me the honor of being my wife? ”

“Oh cory! Of course! I love you so much! I can’t wait to start our life together!”

“Till death do us part…which should be about an hour from now.”

“Oh Cory your so funny!”

If only she knew.

Is it wrong I find it hilarious that elder sims can die from the stress of woohoo? My favorite kill method ever.

Again Cory didn’t even get out of bed to mourn or cry when FW2 died. He only cried at the urn when I made him!

 

To be continued….

Will Grim finally get a life and  stop stalking Cory, at the risk of losing his apartment key!?

No Name legacy chapter 3!

Welcome to chapter 3 of the No Name Legacy. No murder yet, but I promise its coming. Cara spends the first four days of teenhood sucking on various necks.

Leaving bodies in her wake. It was at this point I started to develop a dislike for her. I had no idea why really.

And Danna, well, Danna was cheering on her daughter and sucking face with the nanny.

And continuing to turn my favorite Maxis made sims into vampires.

While my legacy is matriarchish. I decided to allow Danna to get engaged to Jean here. Since settings can be changed and male sims can have babies with other men/women it doesn’t really matter what sex the babies are. And also since sims can get married without moving their spouse in, that is in Danna’s future as well.

“Oh Danna, I can’t wait to start our life together, and move onto the legacy lot, and…”

She has some high expectations. Poor thing is delusional. If she’s lucky I won’t get bored with her and kill her later on.

With the parenthood pack comes extra credit projects. Danna helps Maisy here because, as we all know, she is the golden child. And Cara? Well she doesn’t get any help because she really isn’t that important. She bores me. Horribly.

“So Cara, whats sucking on necks like? I wanna do it when I grow up but mommy says I can only scare them with probes….although I guess that will be fun to?”

“Sure kid. But Renee isn’t giving me….”

Hush up Cara. You are not important. Your sister is. Not you. Learn to understand that.

Oh sweetie don’t look so sad. It breaks my evil murderous heart. Don’t worry there is no death in your future. Only adorableness.

I force Cara to help her sister build her mental skill. I can get some use out of her I guess.

And this is what she does pretty much non stop. It’s actually rather annoying and makes me dislike her more. She has the athletic trait, but just refuses to do ANYTHING else. URGH!

Danna is still on her journey to keep some of the maxis made sims alive. Alas, I forgot to return to the lot and Katrina croaked before she could turn into a vampire.

And Danna tied the knot with Jean. Jean I moved into a neighbor’s house so they can still woohoo, etc, on a regular basis.

And triple boost week! HECK YEAH! Don’t know if legacy rules allow it to be used, but, I’m gonna do it anyway. I’m a rebel.

“So I finished building my mental skill, and I’m earning logic points now! Triple boost! Yay!”

I adore you. So much.

So  Maisy is restarting her childhood stage with this potion due to the fact she does not have enough of her “personality” skills high enough to carry over to adulthood and her mom needs her to grow up with three positive traits to complete her LTW or whatever it is called. Cheating? Dunno, but it’s happening!

And Maisy here met this little boy whose name I can’t remember. But he will one day father her babies.

“Wait…I’m like 8 years old…isn’t that thinking a little far ahead…”

Silly boy, you think you have a choice!

“Sweetie after this game I need to teach you to stay please and thank you, and then to say sorry…”

“But  moooom we’ve done that like 10 times today!”

And you will do it ten more until your bar is full!

Cara is inching nearer and nearer to adulthood, so its time to start scoping out possible baby daddies.  This dude is okay, but kinda old…can we kill him with woohoo?

To build one of her skills, Cara is forced to help her little sister do her homework. And at this point Cara is immune to the sun (since I forgot to say that and she isn’t burning to death, etc).

And Maisy continues to skill and just be the cutest little alien spawn ever.

“Why do you hate Cara so much creator?”

That’s an excellent question that I have no answer for.

“What about him?”

Naw, we don’t need red hair. And having a baby with him won’t create enough drama.

“This one?”

You like him, so no. 

And finally I didn’t lose the birthday cake picture! Cara grows up into an adult!

And this dude is randomly checking her out. And no Cara, he’s to ugly to be a baby daddy.

Sorry for having her beat you up Mortimer but she has wanted to win three spars since she was a teen. Apparently she could only fight other teen vampires of which I found NONE.

“I’m hot.”

“Oh god, put some cloths on Cara! You’re going to scar me for life! I’m going to tell mommy!”

“Whatever you little spoiled alien brat.”

Then I had a great idea. It’s not exactly incest since he didn’t father any of her siblings, but Danna had to ask Mortimer to “just be friends” before her daughter could woohoo him without drama on the homestead. 

“WHAT is wrong with you!? He woohooed me, why in the hell would he woohoo my daughter to!?”

Because its funny. Think about it.

“I don’t know why you keep inviting me over.”

“Quiet, your supposed  to befriend me, so we can date as teenagers and have babies when I grow up. That is your purpose. Nothing else.”

“…..crap.”

“A ghost? Should I be scared? Crying?”

Either of those would be nice, yes.

“Well I’m a vampire, why the hell would a ghost scare me?”

Uh….because I said so?

So wrong. But so funny.

And here we go! Generation 3 in the oven! Or half of generation 3. While I really really dislike her, I need a baby from Cara here…just because.

“Hey mom, guess what!?

“You got knocked up by my ex? I wouldn’t look so proud of yourself dear. Its wrong. And gross.”

And funny. You forgot funny.

“But your mother never got pregnant! I’m married with two kids! I don’t need another!”

Oh at least TRY and look happy Mortimer. You don’t ever have to know the kid exist. You don’t need to have anything to do with it.

Even pregnant this is ALL SHE DOES. seriously you are going to sign your own death warrant.

“So yeah, I’m still adorable. Just so you know.”

I don’t think anyone could forget sweetie.

And we will end with Cara going into labor. Boy? Girl? Twins? Find out next time. And most importantly…will I kill her?

No name legacy chapter 2! We have another baby, and growing up!

Welcome to part 2 of the No Name legacy. Which still doest not have a have a name. I’m working on it…sorts, kinda…maybe? Here we find Danna turning Mr. Goth into a vampire. Can’t have him getting old or dying before he possibly gives Danna another child, now can we? Plus I’m going to have her turn some of my favorite townies/Maxis families into vampires so they live foreveeeer.

 

Oh Jean, I love you SO much. Danna can finally afford a nanny for this little vampire. Now I’m not hating toddlers quite as much. Because I can IGNORE THEM while the nanny is here! Jean is freaking awesome in every way.

Don’t you look so innocent Cara. There was no reason to be making a mess.

“But you made me!”

Well…it was cute. And the nanny had to clean it up, not mommy.

So…cute. Ugh.

“When I grow up I’m gonna have teeth THIS BIG!”

Just did a little more research, thank goodness Cara here is not going to be burning to a  crisp as a child. Vampire traits don’t hit till she is a teen. *wipes brow*

Even though our nanny, Jean, is here a lot Danna still has to take care of this little heathen sometimes. I really want her to grow up. Skilling toddlers is painful. She never learned to walk, etc. But apparently that doesn’t matter in sims 4. Since she’s been wandering all over and her mobility is her highest skill. Must be from all of her attempts to run away.

So. Freaking. Cute. I can’t stand it. I hate it and love it at the same time!

“You know I think I was good with one kid, why do I need another one? This one is enough work.”

Your LTW or whatever its called (still to lazy to check), is the parenting skill! So suck it up and Parent!

Since Jean here is such an awesome nanny, Danna here is turning her into a vampire. That way she can nanny for us forever! We’ve had some horrible old lady who ignored Cara here, who unfortunately I didn’t think to kill. I really need to send Danna fishing. We need a cow plant.

Day of the evil old nanny . Cara stood around starving and pooped her pants. Thanks for almost making me lose the good you worthless old hag!

“Why are you here? You got me pregnant, I don’t need you anymore.”

“I wanted to do the right thing by you, marriage, and…”

“Yeah. No. I just need babies, no spouse. So off you go dude. I’ll call you back if this kid isn’t an alien. Renee’s a #$(&#$!”

Danna, don’t tempt me to kill you.

“I figure I have at least another 30 sim days. And I’m pregnant, you won’t kill me.”

Stupid Mortimer kept refusing pregnant Danna’s advances. What the heck man!? Pregnant legacy founder? The aliens were easy to seduce! Mortimer is being a pain in the butt!

“I’m happily married! Stop trying to ruin my marriage!”

And you trust your wife after what she did in sims 2? Cheating with Don?

“I’m living in denial!”

She’s a money-grubbing skank…speaking of skank…maybe we can seduce her!?

“Danna I just don’t get him sometimes. He seems distant.”

“Yeah, I’m not trying to woohoo your husband or anything Bella. Promise.”

Liar.

“Your forcing me!”

 

Even though my plan may eventually destroy the Goth marriage, Danna turned Bella into a vampire as well. I actually do like the Goths. Maybe we won’t destroy their marriage Danna, or maybe we will…choices, choices.

Oh thank god! Praise the plumbob! It’s time for this little Helion to grow up! No more diapers! No more nanny’s! At least until her sibling is born.

Oh Caraline. Your awesome. You survived toddlerhood and didn’t get taken away by social services! Point for me!

“Lemmie guess my future, skilling, skilling, and more skilling?”

Your a legacy kid, what the hell else would you do?

She’s okay now that she is a kid and can pretty much survive on her own. Cute interactions with her mom being able to tuck her in. To bad she can’t bite people yet. It would be amusing as hell to have a child going around biting people.

Cara has the aspiration that makes her want to play on the monkey bars and build physical skills. Sorry, I’m awful at remembering what these things are actually called! She spends ALOT of time gaming.

“Right here Cara, it’s not nice to talk about me in front of me! No respect for her own mother!”

You did pretty much let her do whatever she wanted her entire toddlerhood. Jean here played a large part in raising her. So…can’t really blame the kid. Jean is like a second mom! Best friends with the whole family!

“Mommy while I appreciate the help, aren’t you giving birth? Your needs are negative.”

Okay kid number 2! *chanting* Alien, alien, alien….

Bella go AWAY. And baby alien! YAY! Meet baby girl Maisy. Named after my hamster.

The She’s so…cute? Option I was not expecting. Thought that was only for males who gave birth. Luckily Danna didn’t have the option to send her back to her home world…I thought about it for a few seconds when realizing we were going to have a second toddler to deal with T_T.

At this point I was leaning towards only two children. Since Danna had two girls already. So just in case I had her seduce Mortimer here.

They did very bad things in the closet at one of the clubs. Three times in fact. I resisted the urge to “try for baby” since Maisy is still a baby, and 7 days of toddler hell have not started yet.

Skill building and social building. Woo!

“Mommy, when can I start to bite people? I see you biting everyone in the neighborhood…it looks like fun.”

“When your older sweetie. And it IS fun.”

And also half the town hates her because she never ask for plasma, she just takes it.

Oh sweet little Maisy grew up. So freaking cute. Toddling around in her little sun dress, with eyebrows different then her hair color. For the life of me I could NOT fix this during her toddlerhood. Not sure if it was stupidity on my part, or CAS was just being a brat.

Its stressful being a legacy kid, huh? Oh and clean the tub when your done Cara.

Those eyebrows are ticking me off Maisy. But that blue skin and red hair. Your cuter then your sister was. And thankfully won’t be sucking blood when your older! Although I wish you could. We will just have to kill sims to keep you young.

“Wuv you big sis!”

“You too you little blue freak. Ouch! SHE BIT ME!”

Oh I remember YOU biting Mortimer when you were a toddler, so hush up Cara.

They really are good friends. And the make faces interaction makes me giggle. Maisy totally loves her big sister. Just hoping she doesn’t get taken away due to horrible old lady nanny and her mom painting ALL the time to buy more stuff.

Oh melt my heart Maisy. Your cuter then your sister ever was. Even with mismatched eyebrows that REFUSE to fix.

While not being forced to socialize with her sister Cara is forced to build her motor skill and hopefully max it out before she hits teenhood. (I remembered what it was called! yay!)

“And mommy started on an empty lot Maisy, with nothing but $500 to her name, then I seduced your sister’s daddy, then your daddy, and…”

Danna what is wrong with you!? Your daughter DOES NOT need to hear your torrid romance details.

“Why, isn’t she going to be doing the same thing?”

Uh…no?

So we just got a warning that Maisy is a “helpless toddler”, blah, blah, blah. She would be taken away if we didnt’ feed her, etc. So Cara to the rescue! And now that we have the nanny on speed dial…

Even being a horrible little messy monster is adorable with Maisy. Shes building some skill.

Although Danna wasn’t having any of it and gave her a not so happy stare. Oops.

And since they were best friends and Jean stopped our Toddler’s from being taken away countless times, Danna moves in for a little action.

Or ALOT of action. While the nanny was on duty. All in a day’s work, huh?

Did I SAY you could play!? Back to skilling! You only have a few days left as a child! Chop! Chop!

“I AM skilling! See! My motor bar is going up!”

Oh. I bad. Carry on then.

And little Maisy grew up! Ugh, your bald! No eyebrows!

“Don’t look at me! I’m ugly!”

To the mirror, STAT!Your adorable kiddo! Although those eyebrows…ugh. Will the NEVER match your hair! I MADE THEM MATCH IN CAS!

…and right to making a mess. Really Maisy, you’re the golden child! Stop acting like a brat this instant! All your mom’s hopes of raising a kid with three of new parenthood personality traits maxed rides on you! Since I wasn’t paying attention and ignored it when Cara was a child. I bad.

“Stop! I can’t see! Get your blue alien but outta my way!”

“Cara, your half alien to…so…”

“I don’t care! Im a VAMPIRE. Not an alien. SO MOVE!”

“Blue freak.”

“Vampire wannabe.”

“Smurfette.”

“Fangless gummy bear!”

I just…I don’t even know. But at least we are DONE WITH TODDLERS! Joyous day!

“So mommy, I’m growing up today, but SOMEBODY *evil stare* lost my birthday pictures!”

Pfft, I took some, but I don’t know what happened to them! Don’t look at me like that!

So Cara here grew up into a teenage vampire. Fangs and all. I quickly realized a teenage vampire could be a problem. Luckily her birthday fell on a thursday. She took the next day off of school and spent the entire weekend biting people so I could get her the sun resistant perk.

Really, just like her mom, Cara had no preference who she snacked on.

Danna even cheered her on. Go figure.

So I will leave you guys on some mother/daughter bonding time. Guess sucking plasma out of victims as a great bonding experience.

Join me next time! For more birthdays! More blood sucking! And possibly murder?

Murder is Fun Legacy: Chapter 4: Meet Saturn, Venus, and Booger

Last time with left the legacy family, twins Venus and Saturn had just been born. Since babies are boring lets skip right ahead to passed that first birthday. Here is Hannah holding Saturn. A huge bug-eyed girl. Since my sim’s cannot marry the father of their future children I have decided to have dual heiresses this generation. Both twins will have  a child once they reach adulthood.

Saturn’s hair is naturally black, I made it red so I could tell the two of them apart. Venus has black hair.

“And I shall remain forever young and beautiful.”

Yeah, I’ll have to deal with that eventually Hannah. Either by death or moving you out, I’m not sure. Or you can just be a legacy slave. You do take good care of the kids.

Unlike her twin, Saturn has huge bug eyes. But has a nose. Kinda cute in a frog type of way. And like her father, this little angel has 0 nice points.

“Bugger off voice, I have to learn to walk, talk, and use the potty. You are distracting the Mother Unit.”

Perhaps little demon is more appropriate.

Venus here seems to have pulled a wild card. She has 10 nice points.  Must be those funky alien genetics. I adore her. She is cuter then her sister in my opinion. I find the lack of a nose on an alien sim quite fetching.

“Why thank you voice. My parents and sister do not understand me. They are violent and like to kill. It’s actually quite sad.”

Aww, don’t worry Princess, you always have me.

“Daddy says I should be scared of you.”

Don’t listen to your father. He isn’t very smart. Just saying….

Again, sorry for the cruddy picture taking. I can’t use the tab key to get closer unless I want my game to crash. Marcis here is actually proving to be a decent parent to the twins. Although Hannah is better. And she isn’t even their biological mother!

“If Mother Unit hears you voice, she won’t be happy. Anyway, she doesn’t like you. I’m not sure I do either.”

Oh be quiet Saturn. Be  a good girl and let your daddy read to you.

“Mommy, I love you!”

“Voice, although I detest speaking with you, what is wrong with this fleshy child? It is to vocal, and demands snuggles. I do not snuggle.”

Ten nice points Hannah. Its a concept the rest of you will never understand. You know….being nice?

“The concept is pointless. Anger and violence achieve more.”

“Freak.”

“Daddy did teach me to speak Saturn!”

Saturn be nice to your sister! 

“But…but….she is TO nice. She should embrace her angry side.”

So says the toddler. I see you spinning up wants to be snuggled. Your *so* mean Saturn. 

Venus screams her head off, while Saturn she stands there looking rotten.

“If they don’t hurry up, I’m going to make sure Venus never cries again.”

Pfft. Your all talk kiddo.

“Love kitty! My kitty!”

Noodle I feel for you, but at least she doesn’t try and strangle you like Saturn. 

Family togetherness, except the fact that Saturn punches her toys. Little Venus just sits there quietly.

I wonder if the nanny’s are spreading rumors about us. This one can’t care for the twins if her life depended on it. Which with Hannah living in the house it may. Each nanny has taken it upon herself to poke/slap Hannah. The gate is locked right now lady. I’d watch myself.

Hahaha. Justice is sweet Marcis. 

“Ugh. I smell, the kid smells, and I’m starving.”

Your daughter mister.  Clean her up and take care of it.

Finally! I hate raising twins, even with two adults in the house. The nanny’s are useless. Or maybe its the fact we have killed a couple.

Uh. Oops? Showing what a *great* player I am Venus passes out right after growing up, and Saturn is complaining about something. Sorry girls!

“Vacation!!!”

Yes, vacation. The grew up two hours ago and I am forcing them to go on vacation. Mostly to skill. And still no decent face pictures. Oops. 

Here is Saturn, apparently lost in her plot of world domination. Or something.

“I’m debating if its better to cheat at chess, or just knock the pieces of the board if I lose?”

How about being fair?

“No, that’s no fun. Honesty is for losers.”

And sweet little Venus, who is spinning wants to be best friends with her sister.

“We are going to be the bestest friends ever!”

“Saturn, I don’t see Mother doing the cha cha with the grim reaper!?”

“Keep looking, they are RIGHT OVER THERE!” *cheat*

Saturn you are a rotten child. Venus is to nice and naive to call her evil sister out on it.

I did try forcing the twins to garden for about one day, but got bored pretty quickly. Maybe next generation. I have no desire for plant sims anyway.

Saturn is also somewhat of a slob. She shovels her food in her face, while Venus takes her time. 

And of course nothing changes with these two. 

“A little lower Hannah, oh baby, that’s the spot!”

“Shall we take this to the bedroom fleshy husband?

“Yeah! You can do that thing you figured out how to do with your electrical current!”

SHUT UP!

Study my minions! STUDY! Marcis earned the fast skilling book case as a career reward. It is great for forcing legacy children to max their skills. All children in the legacy (who will be living on the main lot/going to college) will have maxed skills.

While she is usually a nasty sim, Hannah does have a soft spot for her daughter. 

“Mommy, your the best!”

“Urk…okay fleshy child.”

“Your so silly mommy!”

“You cheat again fleshy child, you will end up with the nanny’s in the back yard!”

“Well, if YOU catch me again Mother Unit I will, I will….uh….”

While her cheating tactics work on Venus, Hannah catches Saturn on her first attempt at cheating. She was not happy with her.

Like her father, Venus cleans constantly. She is mostly cleaning up after her pig of a sister.

“Must get dishes clean, they are SO dirty…”

Okay Hannah since we have this tiny issue of you living forever, time to earn some badges while you are on vacation. And SNAPDRAGONS!

“*lifts middle finger* At least I have some use, yes voice? Oh look at that I am spinning the want to make out with my fleshy husband right now.”

GET BACK HERE! You do NOT get to cancel my commands to make out!

Oh no…no no no no NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Let me reiterate: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I had thought that the sphere pregnancy after alien abduction had been a glitch years ago. I didn’t realize it was in the itunes version to! 

“Hannah is going to love the new slimmer me! Hey did you hear something?”

#$*#($&@#($&~!!!!!!!!!!! No Marcis. I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear a lullaby signaling another pregnancy. While you are on vacation no less! I don’t even think that is supposed to happen! Stupid non-glitch, stupid once fat founder. 

“You smell something Venus?”

“Flowers?”

You know I never used these when I used to play. I didn’t realize it kept sims pretty much in the green in all moods! Freaking awesome! Now they can keep skilling till they pass out! Skill slaves, SKILL! You will now be seeing snapdragons EVERYWHERE.

“I have a bad feeling…..”

*bangs head on keyboard while screaming* You and me too Marcis.

“All the woohoo I get is excellent with the fleshy one. Just so you know.”

Do you want to be left out in the rain, forced to swim, or take a shower? If not then I suggest shutting up!

“Well…this sucks.”

Your telling me. You already have two girls! You don’t need another kid! Now you have to leave vacation early because I have no idea what will happen if you have the kid here!

Oops. First think that happens when they come home is we kill the house sitter. Another nanny. Crap.

“If I could beat you up voice, I would. We have not had any fun since we grew up! I’ve maxed three skills, and have YET to play!”

So is the life of a legacy Saturn. 

“Excellent. Aspiration boost.”

Who did you see Hannah?

“Karen Ghast. Guess she may still be angry about dying twice. And me drinking her. She should have considered that before she poked me.”

“I really don’t want to do this again.”

I would say it was your own fault, but really it’s mine. I didn’t know! I didn’t want another baby! It better only be ONE! Preferably a girl.

A baby boy. Meet Booger. He will not have to skill like his sisters, as he is a worthless boy, and I am going to kill him as a teenager anyway. Black sheep!

“Your talking about murdering my son? What kind of sicko are you!?”

Oh Marcis, you have no idea.

“I think you left the gate open Voice. This idiot is dying.”

Oops. Sorry Meadow. I really didn’t mean to kill her. That gate unlocked ITSELF.

“Sure voice, and I have ten nice points.”

“Well, that was interesting.”

Sorry Saturn, you didn’t really need to see that. At such a young and tender age.

“Do it again.”

Uh…okay?

Saturn, no playing on the graves of dead people!

“Meh, they can’t tell. Anyway, pretty soon the yard will be filled with neighbors and nanny’s who keep making mommy mad.”

“Hannah is so hot when she beats people up!”

For the life of me I can’t remember who she beat up. I think it was another nanny. They just seem to be naturally mean, or have a death wish.

Nor do they have tact. They also enjoy making out in front of the cow plant, and on the graves of the murdered nannies.

“Voice, are you sure I wasn’t adopted?”

Sorry Venus, I saw your daddy give birth to you. No such luck.

Really you guys…this isn’t healthy. At all.

“Get the hell out of my house, and stay away from cow plants.”

I felt bad killing the neighborhood skank. I mean….it was an accident. She went right off to college.

And Booger grew up. Arn’t you a delightfully ugly?

“I don’t wanna die! Kill mommy instead!”

Hmm. Another mean sim. 

And the girls got into private school. We failed by one point the first time. Unfortunately the head master left before I could unlock the cow plant gate.

You two realize this is the SECOND time Noodle has died? You can stop spinning those wants to rez him RIGHT NOW. Once is more then enough!

End part 4.

Murder is Fun Legacy: Meet Marcis.

Meet Marcis.

“You know it’s spelled Marcus, right?”

Oh be quiet. Me player. You Sim. In the game is Marcis!

“And you used thumbnail pictures.”

Do you even understand how many HOURS it took me to find the pictures for your story on my MAC, much less figure out how to upload them? QUIET YOU! Your lucky your getting any face time at all! Your freaking kids (er future kids) are in COLLEGE. I’ll fix it next time. Maybe. If I figure out how!

“And your giving the story way….real smart. I’m just saying.”

I’m going to murder you.

“Yeah. Before I finish college, before I have kids. Brilliant there.”

I hate you.

So smart alec here is a knowledge sim with some LTW I can’t remember off the top of my head. He has 0 nice points, full neatness, full active, and uh….something else. He will be founding a matriarch legacy. So, girls only. No marriage. Except for Marcis here. He will be marrying his servo.

“Matriarch? So alien babies? Nice. But what if I don’t get abducted….oh wait, you already gave that part of the story away. Idiot.”

I have not played this game in years Marcis, so I am itching to murder. Don’t tempt me. It’s only your first day in college. 

“Blah. Blah. Blah.”

“Rain? Nice! “

I thought so. Your actually a pretty good looking sim, Marky.

“I’m basically a CAS face with cruddy changes….your talent is technically some elses.”

Your lucky I almost like you.

“Should I be thanking you. Bowing down to your greatness?”

Preferably. 

“I’d sooner woohoo the llama.”

Cheating Marcis? 

“As always. Not my fault I have 0 nice points.”

Luckily this sim isn’t to bright. She didn’t catch you.

“I concur. Look at that, we are friends now.”

For a knowledge sim your pretty freaking stupid. The fridge is like…right behind you. Two steps away.

“Yeah, well. If you had not made me study until I was starving, this wouldn’t have happened!”

Excuses, Excuses Marcis.

Like I said. Stupid. I have killed sims for less. Well…I used to. I have not murdered since 2007 .

“

“This is fun. Like…plus three thousand aspiration points fun.”

No. Just no. Term papers are not fun. College research papers are not fun. 

“Bonus points!”

Knowledge sims are so easy to please.

“If you are going to start murdering sims. Start with that (insert cuss word of choice) cow! Do you SEE what he did!? I have to clean it!”

Tempting Marcis. But not yet. This is a cheat free game this time. No custom content, no boolprop. Nothing. 

“Ugh. I wish you created me in 2007 or before. That thing would be dead. You see my relationship panel? Negative relationship! I would even be willing to smash his urn or kick the tombstone!”

Bet you would. I love mean sims.

It takes longer then sims I remember, but Marcis can make friends.

“She smells. Literally. She walks around fumigating the dorm with her stench.”

True. Marcis has currently hates her, for making some type of mess I assume?

What are you complaining about now? I’m trying to help you here. Unlimited fall. Cheating or not, I’m not sure. But you skill painfully slow.

“My social bar! It’s like…negative red!”

Then go make friends genius.

See, is that so hard?

“Yes.”

“Ehehe….”

Super sneaky there Marky. The entire community lot can see you.

“But…bubbles! And vandalism!”

Talk to her! Quick! Right now!

“What’s the rush?”

Secret society! COW PLANT! BONE PHONE!

“I’m not sure what those are, and I’m not sure I want to know.”

Tools of the murder business Marky.

“I’m feeling strangely liberated!”

Apparently I have you alot of outgoing points as well. But really Marky, nobody wants to see that.

Ugh my camera angles suck. My game crashes if I try and zoom in and use tab. So, its default picture taking for me.

“Your just trying to hide the fact you su….”

Might I suggest you don’t finish that sentence Marky?

“Point taken and noted.”

“Mmm….”

No Marcis. You can stop spinning that want right now. No woohoo. 

“Fear my wants panel.”

I tremble with fear.

What did I tell you?

“You said no woohoo, what about engagement?”

No Marky poo, your wife has yet to exist. You have to make her.

“Uh…”

“You can kill the whole dorm if you would like. I hate them all. Slobs.”

Oh chill out Marky, another two semesters. You will survive.

“You can only hope!”

“I’m going to vomit. Do these sims not understand the concept of a bath?”

They are college doormie sims Markis, they are stupid AI. Kinda like you.

“But…SHOWER. I do that by myself!”

Because your neat to the point of obsession.

Last I checked you were a knowledge sim Marcis. 

“Easier access to the secret society and whatever those things you wanted me to steal are.”

You are right. In that case carry on seducing the members.

“Why? I should be skilling! Or doing school work!”

Oh be quiet and build your wife.

“I fail to see how this will help me.”

All in due time Marcis.

“This uh…isn’t exactly what I had in mind.”

Shush you. Be a good sim and go steal me what I need.

“Yay?”

Quick! While they are distracted! Go get me my cow plant!

“Working on the diversion. You can go steal now.”

*click* *steal* *click*

So much hatred Marcis. 

“If she doesn’t bathe she will find out what a mean sim I really am!”

Well, that’s not good. Stupid cow. It’s okay though Marcis. That fling isn’t important.

“But…the red rings!:

Get over it. Go beat  her up if you want to.

Marcis…what did you do?

“Influence baby!”

*sigh*

“So….I built a servo. Can I turn her on now? I have been spinning wants to woohoo all semester.”

No. No. NO!

“But….”

Extreme start Marcis.

“Well, I graduated.”

Indeed Marcis. I can hardly wait for the fun. Seven days of lot living, maybe some pets, alien babies and your wedding to your future servo.

“Uh….well as long as you have my life planned out I guess?”

Darn strait mister.

End part 1